Tuesday, March 21, 2006

Eight Is Enough

Well, I think the moon looked blue last night. And if it was, it's because it was so damn cold—25 degrees this morning, which is stupid for late March. March madness, indeed. And if you'd like another non-sequiter, I don't want to talk about my bracket (or North Carolina, for that matter). I'd also like to temporarily ignore the Knicks (although you can see my latest comments on that mess on SLAMonline.com today) and get to something I've been meaning to write about for quite some time.

That would be Kobe Bean Bryant.

Some of you are aware that I wrote the cover story on him for SLAM 97. Even less of you are probably aware that I wrote the cover stories on him for two issues of KICKS, interviewing him at length in two consecutive summers following the Lakers first two titles. One would think, based on all that, that I would have a pretty good grasp on who Kobe Bryant is, what he's really like. One would be wrong.

I had 3,000 words for this last story, and I feel like I couldn't have told the full story in 10,000. Since Kobe was good enough to speak at length, I felt his words needed to be printed, so that cut my own room for analysis in half. I got to most of my points, but there were a few things I didn't get to address. So I figured I'd do that here.

His tunnel vision, for instance. Or self-absorbtion, if you prefer. He seems to be able to put anything and everything aside in order to go out there and perform, which is equal parts admirable and creepy. It's how he could go directly from court in Colorado to the court in L.A. and score 40 and hit game-winning shots. Probably how he could co-exist with Shaq for so long despite their obvious lack of connection. But it's also how he can still be yelling at his teammates on the court for mistakes, rather than waiting until they were back in the locker room. Instead of correcting in private, he does it in front of the coaching staff, the opponents, the TV cameras. One gets the feeling that this isn't Phil Jackson approved behavior (although one also gets the feeling that Phil, like Larry Brown, may be content to just cash the checks at this point).

There's also the rather hard-to-ignore matter of his taking so many goddamn shots. It's obvious that he doesn't trust his teammates much, if at all, and feels as he's the best option every time down the floor. This may indeed be true. But it's not the way you win in the long run. Michael Jordan was certainly the best option every time down the floor for the Bulls, but he didn't start winning championships until he started to trust role guys like John Paxson and Steve Kerr (not to mention bigger cogs like Scottie Pippen and Horace Grant).

I'm too distracted by "Team America: World Police" right now. More tomorrow or tonight.

Wednesday, March 08, 2006

Hell Freezes Over

Quick, what's more shocking—the fact that there's an update here, or the fact that the Knicks have won two straight? Take your time, I know it's a tough one.

OK, not that much time.

So this week I saw the second-most disgusting thing I've ever seen in an NBA locker room. The first-most disgusting thing I've ever seen in an NBA locker room—one that is likely never to be topped—was Anthony Mason conducting interviews buck-ass naked. What barely beat out Damon Jones's bare feet for second was this: Kings center Brad Miller with a pinch of mint Skoal (the blue can) in between his lip and gum, spitting tobacco juice into an empty Dasani bottle. Not the most flattering habit, as habits go.

More later—I just wanted to get something new up before Lang made fun of me.

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Oh Yeah

I forgot something about the Pistons and the Darko Milicic Experiment when I wrote about it yesterday: If Carmelo Anthony (who, last I checked, led his college team to a CHAMPIONSHIP as a FRESHMAN) would have messed up the chemistry and derailed the Pistons by taking away minutes from Tayshaun Prince, wouldn't you think that Tayshaun (and no disrespect intended here) would have been an All-Star by now?

Look, he's a nice piece, and he fits in well with what the Pistons are trying to do. His long arms and quickness obviously bothered Kobe Bryant when they beat the Lakers in the Finals. But on a squad THAT team-oriented, wouldn't he have been just fine with platooning with Anthony, giving him minutes when they needed an offensive burst, and coming back on when they needed more D? And wouldn't have Anthony, the year after winning his own title, fully understood what it took to win, and accepted less minutes for the greater good? (In fact, wouldn't Anthony have been able to get minutes at the 2, 3 AND 4, depending on the looks they wanted to throw out there?) It's hard to imagine ANY way how the Pistons would have been worse with Anthony instead of Darko.

The Ship Be Sunk

Another night, another 20-point loss for New York's aptly nicknamed Team Titanic and the Unsinkable Larry Brown. On a day that saw Isiah Thomas and James Dolan add another ill-advised max contract holder to their collection (Stevie Franchise), the Heat came to town and laid the smack down, beating the hapless Knicks 103-83.

Francis was acquired for nothing much—the moldering corpse of Penny Hardaway and the delusional Trevor Ariza—but it's hard to imagine how his arrival is going to do any good. Unless there are more trades in the works (and seeing that Isiah remains in charge, they probably are), Francis's arrival probably makes things worse. Assuming that's possible.

For starters, minutes. Penny hadn't played a one for the Knicks this year, and Ariza had fallen out of favor long before yesterday. Francis, on the other hand, has been a constant starter, and will probably expect 35 minutes a night, minimum. It's hard to imagine Stephon Marbury's minutes being reduced, so Jamal Crawford and Nate Robinson should expect a change of scenery or drastic reductions in playing time.

Then there's the fact that Francis is essentially a carbon copy of Marbury—and he's had a hard enough time figuring out Brown's way (which, incidentally apparently involves lots of different starting lineups and games that are decided by the midway point of the third quarter). While a starting backcourt of Steph and Franchise may be good enough in the world of fantasy basketball, it's hard to imagine it working very well in the real world. Both want to dominate the ball, and neitehr are going to be terribly thrilled about guarding opposing twos.

And of course there's the little matter of getting under the salary cap, which at this rate should happen around the year 3000. I'm actually amazed at the fact that Isiah didn't mention Stevie's contract expiring in 2009 or whenever as one of the main reasons for acquiring him (when he can then be traded for some other guy with four years or so left on his own ridiculous max extension, like Boris Diaw or Darko Milicic).

Meanwhile the Knicks continue to stagger towards the lottery, where they can drop Rudy Gay or J.J. Redick or that big kid from Texas right into the waiting arms of the forever grateful Chicago Bulls. Tonight, Eddy Curry, the centerpiece of that trade, managed a whole four points and four rebounds before fouling out and getting booed all the way to the bench. Yet he still looks like a combination of Wilt Chamberlain and Mechagodzilla next to Jerome James, who's pretty much done nothing to distinguish himself since partying too hard on New Year's Eve.

Best I can tell, Isiah is assembling this team by poring past All-Star rosters and seeing who he can get, with no regard how they fit together. Which, as seemingly anyone could figure out, is a bad idea. Look at it like food: say you like steak, and chocolate, and bacon, and sushi, and pizza. That doesn't mean they'd taste good mixed together. Not sure why it's taking Zeke so long to realize.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Second Half Buzzer

Yeah, I know. I failed to blog during the All-Star game. Actually, I DID keep notes on here, but they were embarassingly bad. Nothing worth wasting anyone's time with. So I figure, to make up for it, I'd just mention a few things from the trade deadline, the first half just past, and the second half which is just getting started. (I'm watching Mavs/Clippers right now.)

THE DARKO TRADE: You know what? I think that Joe Dumars is an outstanding GM. I think that the Pistons are probably the best TEAM in the NBA (and they apparently don't need Larry Brown to succeed). But I'm tired of him getting a free pass on the Darko Milicic pick, because taking someone like Wade or Carmelo would have cut into Rip Hamilton or Tayshaun Prince's minutes, and thus ruined the team's delicate chemistry, and resulted in their not winning an NBA title, which indeed they did during Darko's rookie season. Nice theory, I suppose, but isn't that a case of trying too hard?

Why wouldn't you want the best player available, no matter how your team is set up? Wouldn't you want to try to work Carmelo or Dwyane Wade into that rotation? Seems like some analysts go so far to say that the pick was actually the RIGHT move for the Pistons. In that case, would it have been an equally good pick had they just passed? Or picked, say, me? I would have been even better than Darko, because I wouldn't have cared about playing time. Not only that, but if you're going to play fortune teller and assume that the Pistons would have won neither title with Wade or 'Melo (which I still think is ridiculous), couldn't you also assume that, had they traded Darko for solid bench help at the end of his first season, that they could have won two straight and been looking for their third? Sure, they got back a lottery pick from Orlando, but this year's draft id full of question marks. Kind of like Darko.

As for Darko himself (some SLAM readers will remember I picked him over LeBron to be Rookie of the Year, thanks to extreme Chad Ford-driven hype—never again), it'll be interesting to see how he fares in Orlando. If nothing else, he should get a lot of playing time, and maybe have a chance to get into a rhythm, which he never was able to do in Detroit. Even when he did get extended minutes, which was a rarity, it was usually in garbage time, which doesn't much resemble real NBA action. He's still only 20, and I do believe that the reasons Detroit liked him so much HAD to be based on some fact and real skill. It's far too early to declare him a bust. Will he have a Jermaine O'Neal-type breakout season? It's possible.

And what if he does? Does Detroit look bad for dealing him? Probably not, actually. As long as they remain contenders, and put out a young, talented lineup who all seem to get along swimmingly, there's no regrets. They continue to pursue titles, and Darko finally gets to play and perhaps blossom. But Carmelo Anthony would still look mighty good in royal blue.


THE KNICKS: Yeah, I know, I talk about them every time I post. I can't help it. They're absolutely amazing. And now there's talk of them trading for Steve Francis without giving up Stephon Marbury in the process. Do they not have to pay the remainder of Larry Brown's salary if he commits suicide? I like Steph and Franchise personally, but is that a backcourt you want to have out there (one that's owed roughly $100 million over the next three years, at that). It's hard to say that Jamal Crawford is a bargain, but he's a blue-light special compared to Francis. And if Maurice Taylor is included, this trades an expiring contract for another long maxed-out one. Pardon me for being cynical, but at this rate Ground Zero is going to be rebuilt before the Knicks are.

It'll also be interesting to see what happens with the rookies. I fully expect at least one to be gone by Thursday, for no other reason than they'll have to include one in any trade just to interest any other teams. My money would be on Nate Robinson, who doesn't really fit in to begin with—and would fit in even worse behind Francis and Marbury, neither of whom are very tall.

Back to Francis for a minute, haven't most of his recent issues been with coaches? Brian Hill and Jeff Van Gundy? Why would things be any different with Larry Brown, especially in a situation as hopeless as this one? I'd rather see the Knicks try and land a bonafide superstar—like Kevin Garnett or Allen Iverson—to at least give them some identity.


THE MVP: Right now I'm looking at Steve Nash. Chauncey Billups is up there, but the fact that three of his teammates were All-Stars seems to indicate that they all share the credit. All Nash has done is lead a Phoenix team who have been without three of last year's starters to a 35-17 record. Credit Shawn Marion with a lot, but it's Nash who has helped turn afterthought Boris Diaw into a stellar player, and kept the team going without Amare Stoudemire.


THE TRADE DEADLINE: Judging from the staggering number of players who have been brought up in potential trades—and the names of them—it appears readily apparent that there are just a lot of teams out there who have basically no idea what they're doing. That, and the fact that it's harder and harder to justify your players huge salaries when your team is losing.

There's probably a whole four teams who can afford to do nothing—Phoenix, Dallas, San Antonio and Detroit. Every other team should have an active war room. Of course, this probably means that next to nothing will happen. Or, you could see names like Garnett, Pierce, Iverson, Martin, Marbury, Francis, etc., changing teams. I'll definitely write more on this stuff as it happens.


CHRIS KAMAN'S HAIR: What's up with that, dude?

Saturday, February 18, 2006

NBA Saturday Night

Hm. The stuff before the actual events on TNT are kind of lame. "The Best Dunk Ever"? I feel like the Jason Richardson off the glass and through the legs is the best dunk ever, and it didn't even make it out of the first round! Stupid, stupid, stupid.

Skills comp is first, and it probably has the best cast of characters. Nash, LeBron, Dwyane? This should be fun.

Shaq can dress! Three-piece and a biscuit. And actually the other crap is first, with the legends and stuff. Dan Majerle! Magic Johnson! Can't wait!

Steve Nash still has Marilyn Quayle's hair. Oh yeah, shooting stars is first. Still gotta get them WNBA players up in here. WE DON'T CARE. And it's crazy that Magic is still doing this shit. Feels like he'd come back again if they'd let 'em. Wonder if Nike told Kobe to do it? And T-Mac? Star-studded, at least. Not paying attention to the first thang, though. Worst. Competition. Ever. One round? That was seriously terrible. And I still hate the WNBA. Skills next.

I'm pulling for Lebron in the skills challenge just because he's not a point guard. Reason enough for me. CP3 would be fine, too. And he's up first. Kenny's right—CP ain't fast enough. And his chest pass sucks. Dribbling is toooo sloooow. He ain't moving on. Trust me.

D. Wade is up next. Dunk e'rything! Reggie's right on the wack jumper, but he still wastes CP3. LeBron now. He ain't gettin' there. Too big to dribble fast. Beat CP3, but Nash'll be faster. Although he can't shoot. And thinks he can. Out. So it's Wade against Bron in the final. Which is also wack. This comp ain't the greatest. But Bron has a killer run in the final, and Wade's got a tough road.

But he hits EVERYTHING on his first try. And he probably deserved to win, but how is it only two rounds? Waaaaack. Still, big ups to D Wizzy. Good roll. And now we get to the real events.


I can't even pick a winner in the three-point shootout. Arenas? Q ain't gonna defend, and Ray-Ray takes too much time. F it, I'm going with Chauncey.

Gilbert missed his entire first rack, and ain't so good through a couple. 14 is all right, but he ain't goin' nowhere. And Jason Terry is slow, with only 13. You out, too.

Diiiiiirk. Long hair fo sho. Shoots all right, but gets 12. Charles Barkley is on fire with the commentary. None of these guys are winning, I don't think. But they count Dirk's moneyball even though it was obviously late! Ain't cool. Ray up now, and he's on. Kills it. 19 points, which ain't bad at all.

Now Chauncey. And he's out. Brickin' galore. Misses a lot of the money balls, and now it's Q. He's out, too. Misses last six. So it's Gilbert, Dirk and Ray A in the Final. Goin' with Dirk.

Gilbert's got 16 first, although this should be 20 for the win. And there aren't enough rounds like there used to be. Too many comps now. Dirk loads 18, and that's awesome, but it leaves the door WIDE open for Ray Allen. Who runs out of time. And Dirk wins. And this sucks. Come on, y'all, gotta have at least three rounds! Better work on this. But I got it right, right? Um, despite the fact that he shouldn't have even been in the final.

I'ma take Igloodala in the dunk contest.

But yeah, Andrea Bocelli first. Blind-ass cracka.

Four competitors in the dunk contest? Four? That's pathetic. PATHETIC. Kill the shooting comp! And Charles Barkley is the best. Period. Hakim Warrick is aiight with his first, but it's a long way from great. Iggy's much better. Windmill off the bounce, that's real. Nate's even realer, though, 3-6 off the bounce. With both hands. Mean, Now it's J Smoove, and he's got on the free-throw line with both hands. And that's the lowest score of the night? HATERS.

Hakim's got a nice beard, but that's it. Miss the first attempt? And that second wasn't nothin' anyway. Should be a wrap for HW. But we got too much weird shit with passes. Chill, AI Jr! Ai't you got enough of your own shit? Looked aiight, but too many attempts. Too complicated. Shit was cool, but it barely even made sense. On second thought, that's a winner. A serious 50.

Nate's was OK, but J Smoove is goin' to the Finals. Least he better be. 'Cept he can't, because Nate got enough points to make it impossible for Josh to get past him. Shit's fucked up. Nate and Igloo in the finals.

Nate up first, And he tries to go off the glass through the legs? If he hits that, it's OVER. And now it's too many tries. Gettin' bad. Cause it seems like he's tryin' something new. You lost, Nate. Good tries, though. And he does get through the legs, but it takes what, eight times? East Bay funk, what? CB remains realistic.

And AI off the bounce and behind the back? Silly. That ain't right. One last dunk—Nate better get real. The Spud jersey? Already done last year with J Smoove. Bangin' for sure, but to win? Tough call. AI's only gotta get 45 to win. But he better get the shit DOWN. Lots of misses, too. Sucks for real. Missing is bad news. And that ain't enough for me. But it's a tie! Which is better, actually. Let's see where it go.

And OK, there are WAY too many attempts allowed. What the fuck? Nate's turning into Birdman without the meth. How many times can you try? At this point, he's trying it often enough so Dre falls asleep, I think. I think the fans are falling asleep, too. As am I. Please get something? OK, he gets it, but a dozen-plus tries? And a 47? Come on. If that wins...that's bad. 14 tries? What the fuck?

AI up, and...let's see. Baseline through the legs, on the second try, and it's not enough to win? BULLSHIT. That's fucking terrible—they gave Nate that many tries? So, so, so, so bad. All-Star Saturday can fuck off.

And I'm out.

Friday, February 17, 2006

2006 Rookie Challenge

No offense to Dwight Howard and Chris Paul (and several other guys), buy this might be the lamest Rookie Challenge ever. No LeBron and Carmelo and Dwyane, no Iverson or Kobe or T-Mac, just a bunch of guys who in some cases don't even start for their own teams. Heck, Channing Frye only got 15 minutes for the Knicks in their last game, and that team is 20-plus games below .500. Sure, Andre Iguodala may throw down a rugged dunk or 10, but Howard and Paul seem to be the only two guys who have any chance at playing on Sunday in the coming years. And Paul's hurt (although he will play). Meanwhile, last year's rookie of the year, Emeka Okafor, is out. At least we get to listen to John Thompson, who seems like he's on something. OK, and TJ Ford could be exciting, along with the 13 Bulls who are on the sophomore squad. And maybe Nate Robinson will give us a little dunk contest preview. Still, though, this isn't really much of a premier event. It'll be interesting to see how many people are in the stands (I'm guessing a lot of people will skip it in favor of the party circuit, which oughtta be in full swing already.

Hey, it's the T-Mobile Rookie Challenge! Maybe I should be watching this on my Sidekick? Good to see some Rockets legends getting love on the coaching staffs. And Luther Head is the first introduced—sheesh. This IS bad. Danny Granger, Sarunas Jasekevicius, Andrew Bogut, Chris Paul, Channing Frye, Nate Robinson, Charlie Villanueva and Deron Williams. They're gonna get KILLED. Meanwhile, the PA announcer needs a Halls or something. Or a record contract from a blues label.

The sophomores: Emeka Okafor (in a suit), Delonte West, Luol Deng (why is he from the Sudan and not Duke?), Ben Gordon, Andres Nocioni, Devin Harris, TJ Ford, Nenad Krstic, Dwight Howard and Andre Iguodala. Yep, they should murk 'em. But no Al Jefferson? That sucks. And no Josh Smith?

I guess this could actually wind up being more of a game, Then again, Channing Frye AND Nate Robinson are starters. Ha. Think Larry Brown is watching this?

Reggie Miller thinks Ben Gordon is gonna be MVP. Ha. I'm going with Dwight Howard.

Nate Robinson jumps center, which shows how serious this game is. Give me a break. And Channing Frye scores on the first shot. Feeling the half-orange, half-white ball. ABA, whoadie.

Turrrrnovers. We're barely a minute into this game and I'm already losing focus. Ben Gordon wets a trey. I kind of wish that the Rooks and Sophs would wear matching unis instead of their team uniforms. Dick Stockton just referred to Nate Robinson as a "little guy," and Reggie Miller picked him to win the dunk contest. I don't see it. Then again, maybe I just want to disagree with Reggie whenever possible.

Rookies lead early, 8-7. It's like a high-school All-Star game, with guys doing stuff that they'd get pulled from a real game for doing. Chris Paul is looking like the MVP early, lacing everyone with passes. Luther Head checks in for Nate Robinson. The sophs are 3-10 from the floor. Can't really see much as far as shoes yet, and Rip Hamilton is the first All-Star they show in the crowd. Wonder how many are even there? Rookies are running away with this, 13-7, and the sophs call time out.

Reggie says that Chris Paul reminds him of Isiah Thomas in All-Star games, trying to get everybody involved. Well, except he didn't kiss a 6-9 guy on the other team, and he's not freezing anyone out best I can tell.

Hey, the Diesel's here! Lookin' good in the vest and the big-knot tie. He says he hasn't been paying attention to the game, just talking to his lawyer. Gangsta. CV with the bucket off the bench. Better pro than college player? No doubt.

Tons of media seats behind the baskets. They ain't seein' much. Lots of sloppy basketball, lots of missed jumpers, lots of long rebounds. Luther Head oop to Villanueva, Krstic fouled on other end. Rooks still up four. Three. Miss-Deng gets it back. One. And another head to Villanueva resets it to three. Nocioni cuts the rookie lead back to one, and Ford dunks to put the sophs up one.

West is in the game—and only here because Jameer Nelson is hurt. Lucky him.

More missed long jumpers. This game sucks.

Delonte West oop to Krstic. Deron Williams, Delonte West trey. Sophs up four. Delonte West layup, sophs up six. Timeout, rookies.

Shooters are SO off tonight it's not even funny. Krstic dunks to be safe, Sophs up 8. Make that 10 after another dunk, this one from Iguodala. Frizye gets fizouled by Krstic. Brick, wet. Then he goaltends Delonte West, who's gonna end up MVP if he keeps this up.

David Aldridge talks about Channing Frye being untouchable. Look, no one is untouchable. You're telling me if the Knicks could get a 25-year-old stud, they wouldn't give up Frye? Because that's just plain nuts. I like Channing, but they'd be a LOT better off with, say, just about anyone who's playing on Sunday (and quite a few who aren't). Is Channing the kind of guy you build a team around? Probably not.

Apparently LeBron and Kobe are in the building—and there they are! Kob's in a Nike jacket, LeBron looks like Kanye West. And hey, the rookies are only down four. Make that six.

Wow, Charles Barkley is a finalist for the Hall of Fame. Like there's any question? If he doesn't get in on the first ballot, someone should burn the damn building down.

Dwight Howard gets the and-1 but not the 1, then he blocks Granger. A turnover keeps the sophs from getting it back to 10.

Nate bricks the hell out of a three. Maybe it's the sight lines. Bogut passes out to the bench. Messy.

Ben Gordon hits a three over Nate Robinson. Eleven, until Bogut dunks in Nocioni's face. International relations, bitch. And then he gets a deep rebound off a Paul miss and whips a behind-the-back pass from the three-point line up top to Nate Robinson underneath. Sick. Off to Frye for the dunk. That's the play of the game so far.

Luther Head three. Eight. The rooks are 1-10 from three, now, and Luther Head is EVERYWHERE. Until Luol Deng gets a dunk. Then Bogut gets one. CP3 has five assists and no points. A Nocioni three and it's back to nine. Chris Paul gets his first bucket, and his yellow socks are gangsta as hell. 52-45 sophs at the half.

The new Jordan XXI ad with the kids replicating some of MJ's most well-known moves is pretty ill. Too bad the shoes themselves look like they were made for Randy Moss.

OK, Charles and Kenny had better kill this game. Or at least Charles better. Oh God, and there's Magic, Mr. Incomprehensibility. Oh yeah, Charles and Kenny both played for the Rockets. Funny. Annnd, they don't. But we do have the Kenny Smith/Reggie Miller three-point shoot out to look forward to. If Reggie loses, he might have to quit TNT.

And even the halftime show was lame, focusing mostly on Barkley's Hall-of-Fame nomination. Terrific.

Sophs up six early in the second half. And it's already 10:15?? This game seems loooong for two 10-minute halves. Guess they gotta stretch it out—which is why it should just be part of All-Star Saturday instead of a free-standing Friday event. Channing blocked by Dwight, then he gets the eventual rebound. His wallet should say "Bad Mother Fucker" on it. But yeah, Channing Frye is untouchable.

You know, that Heineken commercial with the girl who gets random guys to buy her beers, which she then in turn gives to her brother and his friend, is cute and all, but isn't the basic message "never buy a girl a beer again"? Oh well, Heineken is disgusting anyway.

Shit, I half-forgot that Darko is a Magic now. Gonna have to discuss that at some point. The Serbian Gangsta in Orlando.

Sophs up 13 with 16 interminable minutes to go. Turnover, turnover, turnover, Howard dunk. Howard the dunk? Granger trey. 12-point game, 15 and a half. Iguodala makes it 14 with a mean dunk. Iggy hops? Raw power. I'm getting delirious.

I love that TNT is relentlessly promoting the broadcast of "Armageddon." Are you kidding me? Hasn't everyone seen that by now? This is a big deal? Obviously someone over at TNT is even more delusional than I am.

Iguodala again. Blaow. He's got hops.

Luol Deng over Villanueva, his old high school teammate. Dwight gets another block, then on the turnover fouls hell out of Nate Robinson. Jeah.

John Thompson is incomprehensible, and Chris Paul is really good. Sophs by 14 on another Iguodala dunk. Not sure if he's made any other kind of shot. Eleven after a Jasekavicius trey. Wait a minute, isn't Sebastian Telfair a soph? Wouldn't he have made this game a little more entertaining? And given the Blazers a representative?

And yeay, a through-the-legs dunk from Iguodala, and the announcers get excited about it. Um, a straightforward through-the-legs dunk hasn't been exciting in 10 years, fellas. You gotta add some sauce.

Iguodala trey. Sophs up 19 with 8:48. AI might have the MVP on lock. Channing Frye is long. And untouchable, of course. T.J. Ford throws the worst pass of the game. Meanwhile, Chris Paul has like 27 steals. And Iguodala has 25 points. Sophs up 20. Jebus. Nate Robinson is trying fancy shit that'll probably end with his minutes being reduced by LB. Or him getting traded before Sunday. AI for three more. 28. Luther Head with a layup. Delonte West with a layup. He's got a bunch of points. Iguodala misses a through-the-legs dunk on the break (with his left?). Jumped too close to the rim, I think. Sophs up 19.

Pretty sure no one cares about the game at this point, including the people in it. Five minutes.

Chris Paul tosses an oop to Villanueva, and of course we're on the overhead camera from behind, which means the TV audience gets the same view as someone in the 400 level. Um, if there's anyone still there. And then Villanueva gets a three, and Paul gets a dunk on the break. 11-point sophomore lead with three minutes left.

Pretty sure Reggie just called AI "Andre Igloodala." Who gets a dunk and makes it 11 with 2:10 left. Then a dunk which makes it 12 (and he has 30 and a virtual lock on the MVP). He DID call him "Igloodala." Awesome.

It's a minute left and the sophs are up 11. CP turnover, and we're not even getting the final minute dunk contest that we deserve. Bastards. Head gets the ball stuck between the rim and the backboard, which is par for the course. Allen Iverson's on the sideline in full Yankee gear with a watch the size of a hubcap on his wrist blingin' like mad.

106-96 final, and Igloodala was so cold he's gotta get MVP. No dizzle. 30 points on nine dunks and two threes. No one else had 20, although Chris Paul did tie the assist record (11). And hey, AI2 thanks God. Yay.

They'll be back. And maybe I'll be. Not sure.

All-Star 2006

Well, this is the second year in a row that I'm not at the All-Star game, after attending every one since 1997's in Cleveland. New York, Washington, Philly, Los Angeles, Atlanta—all good times. I might go back next year when it's in Vegas. But this year I'll spend it on my couch, blogging the hell out of tonight, tomorrow and Sunday for my huge audience. Probably better off here anyway—from what I understand it's rainy and cold in H-town, and All-Star is usually a big clusterfuck anyway. Sour grapes? Perhaps. But I'm here instead of there, and I'm gonna make the best of it. Back in a half hour for the rookie game.

Tuesday, February 14, 2006

New Theory

Is it too late to bring back Scott Layden and Don Chaney? Does anyone have Clarence Weatherspoon's number? Think Herb Williams could still put in some minutes at center? Through 50 games this year, the Knicks were off to their worst start in history. THEIR WORST START IN 60 YEARS. This with a $100-million plus payroll, the alleged greatest NBA coach, and an alleged genius eye for talent as GM/President. There's obviously something very wrong with this picture. And I have a new theory on what it could be.

Larry Brown is doing this on purpose. He knows EXACTLY what he's doing.

Look, you don't use 30-plus different starting lineups before the All-Star break by accident. You don't shuffle guys in and out of the rotation like a Vegas dealer with ADD just for the hell of it. There must be a method to the madness. And, best I can tell, the only thing that makes sense is that LB is trying to see exactly how much he can get away with. Look at the situation—a Hall of Fame coach making $10 million a season after his last stop yielded him his first NBA championship. He's back home where it all started, he's got a crazily overpaid roster of chronic underachievers, and who could blame him for absolutely not giving a fuck?

Maybe it didn't start out that way. Maybe he did try to win at first, and the lineup shuffling was because he didn't know who could give him what. That's all well and good in November, maybe even in December. But this is FEBRUARY, people. This is the All-Star break, and he STILL hasn't settled on nine guys who can give solid minutes? He hasn't decided whether to let the rookies sink or swim, or to do or die with the veterans? Sorry, I just don't buy it. LB has been around far too long to be this indecisive.

I think after 30 years of coaching, he's just decided to see how much he can get away with. What kinds of weird crap can he pull and still have his management back him and his players not give him a group Sprewell. How far can he bend things before they break? Before you dismiss this as ridiculous, ask yourself one question: Would ANY other coach still have his job after a half-season like this?

The ONLY theory that makes sense is that LB's doing all this crazy stuff on purpose, as a mindfuck to Isiah Thomas, James Dolan, even the players. After all, LB is a genius, right? Read and hear that all the time. Therefore, whatever he's doing must have a purpose, must have a payoff. Meanwhile, the season continues to swirl down the toilet, and Dolan continues to sign a lot of big checks. Payoff? Yeah, folks. LB gets his every two weeks.

Wednesday, February 08, 2006

The Ship Be Sinkin'

Welcome to your nightmare, Jalen Rose. You thought giving up 81 points to Kobe Bryant was bad? Try spending the rest of the season with the Knicks, who lurch towards 20 games under .500 while finding new and creative ways to lose every night. And with a roadtrip beckoning—at Jersey, New Orleans, Houston and Dallas—things are just going to get worse for the worst team in the NBA.

Last night it was the Clippers turn. The Knicks made stringy-haired center Chris Kaman (as astutely pointed out by Nike guy Brian Faccinni, he looks a lot like Hulk Hogan without the mustache) look like an All-Star, and let Sam Cassell bury two treys in the final two minutes to bury them. Throw in (um, or don't, actually) a five-seconds inbound violation with 2.2 left down 1 since they were out of timeouts, and that's all she wrote.

Forgive me for being overly critical, but isn't that why Larry Brown was brought in to begin with? To avoid those incredibly simple lapses that result in losses? Meanwhile Eddy Curry mahaged to snare a whole two rebounds (NONE on the defensive end), David Lee played less than a minute (after getting a DNP the previous night) and Stephon Marbury once again watched from the sidelines (as did Isiah Thomas after a game's absence). Oh, and Malik Rose, who also got a DNP in the previous game, played big minutes. Showcase? On a more positive note, the Knicks didn't fall another game behind the Pistons, who lost to the Hawks.

Here's the thing that's most bothersome about the Antonio Davis trade, besides the fact that they added another year of max contract to the books: They traded the team's conscience for yet another player who doesn't seem to have one. Sure, AD has been kind of crazy this year—not wanting to report, going into the stands, being married to a lunatic. But even at 36 and on the downside, at least he had some PRIDE. He wanted wins, went after rebounds, broke scoreless streaks with emphatic dunks. He showed some emotion, some life. His flagrant foul on Kobe Bryant in the Laker game was uncalled for, but it at least was evidence that someone on the Knicks wasn't going to just stand by and watch the Kobe Show.

Now what? The Knicks are a vastly overpaid collective of untested talents, most whom have had exactly zero experience in the playoffs. Most of them don't know how to win, and evidently don't much care whether they do or not. As long as those five-figure paychecks keep clearing every two weeks, everything's great. To be sure, you don't need an entire team of obsessed winners, just one or two to keep everyone else in line. The Knicks, they had one. They don't anymore.

Wednesday, February 01, 2006

Disasterpiece.

Seriously, how can it get much worse? I was at the Knicks/Lakers debacle last night, and Chris Sheridan—a friend and former AP writer who now writes for ESPN.com—stated that this Knicks era and team wasn't the worst, that it was worse in the Felton Spencer era. Now, it actually took me a minute to remember that Spencer (a soft-in-the-middle bust center who had braces during his stint with the Knicks) was even in New York in the first place, but I don't know. Did anyone think it could get this bad?

It's like Larry Brown is trying to play chess (that's giving him a HUGE benefit of the doubt that I'm pretty sure he doesn't deserve) with Monopoly pieces on a backgammon board. There's no sense to it. And the last two games were just astounding. A Larry Brown coached team giving up 250 points on back-to-back nights? Losing by a combined 52 points? And to the Hawks and the Lakers, neither of who should be competing for a championship. They also allowed the Lakers—not just Kobe, the entire team—to shoot 71 percent (and score 70 points) in the second half last night. In contrast, tonight against the Pacers, with 3:50 to go in the GAME, the Lakers have 73 total points.

Don't give me the whole "rebuilding" thing, either. This is rebuilt! Isn't that what Isiah told us? The payroll's still over $100 million, most positions are filled by vets. Also, THERE IS NO NUMBER ONE PICK to bail out a lottery-bound team. That belongs to Chicago. And even when Penny Hardaway and Antonio Davis disappear off the books this summer, it's not like they'll have cap space to pursue any free agents.

And why would anyone want to come to New York right now anyway? I thought about it while walking home yesterday—the Knicks play in the biggest market in the country, in the best gym to play ball in, have a gleaming new practice facility and the alleged best coach in the game. You'd think a superstar would totally want to play here. But right now, the way things are? I can't imagine a single big name—Wade, LeBron, Kobe, KG—wanting to come here. Well, Kobe maybe, he's the only one crazy enough to think he could turn it all around himself.

Also, what exactly is the esteemed teacher Mr. Brown teaching? Has anyone learned ANYTHING, except to be sure to check the lineup/inactive list very carefully each day? Jamal Crawford is still erratic and turnover prone, Eddy Curry still can't rebound, Jerome James—well, it's best not to even talk about him.

Meanwhile, the rookies are hitting the wall, the best player is the guy who was picked up on waivers (Qyntel Woods), and James Dolan should be happy most of his season tickets are in the hands of corporate drones instead of real fans.

At this point, it's hard to believe that Trevor Ariza's the only member of the organization who's delusional.

Sunday, January 29, 2006

As If Things Weren't Bad Enough.

You can always count on the Knicks to go above and beyond the call of duty when it comes to controversy. Not content with a hugely overpaid roster, a $10 million a year coach who seems to share his temperament with longtime Knick fan Woody Allen, and a record that's a considerable distance from .500, it seemed like now was the right time for a sexual harassment lawsuit against Isiah Thomas.

Now, I have no idea what the truth of the matter is. I haven't talked one-on-one with Isiah since he was coaching the Pacers, and while I occasionally saw his accuser around the Garden, I never once exchanged words with her. I have no idea what—if anything—happened. What I do know is that this is a lose-lose situation. Either it's true, and Isiah is a seriously slimy dude. Or it's untrue, and Anucha Browne Sanders is a loose cannon who probably should have never been given such a high-ranking position with the Knicks in the first place. Either way, the responsibilty rests with the same man—Jim Dolan.

On the court, things aren't that much better. Eddy Curry continues to appear and disappear like some sort of Doug Henning trick, Stephon's shoulder is obviously more messed-up than he wants to let on, and halfway through the season, LB is STILL trying to settle on a rotation. About the best news they've gotten is Jerome James's sprained neck—which has put him in a comical neck brace, and more importantly, keeps him off the court. There have been some positives, including Qyntel Woods's surgence, David Lee and Channing Frye's continued progress, and Maurice Taylor's emergence as an LJ-like post presence (making up for lack of athleticism with guile and craftiness). Also, they didn't trade for Ricky Davis, Mark Blount or Michael Olowokandi. Then again, they didn't trade for Ron Artest, either.

I'd expect the Knicks to make some changes before the trade deadline. They have some excess parts—Jerome James, Trevor Ariza, Malik Rose and an increasingly disgruntled seeming Quentin Richardson. But they can't trade anymore draft picks, and God knows who would want to take on the contracts of James, Rose and Q. And if they pursued a true point guard, they'd probably need to get rid of one of their three undersized guards—Marbury, Crawford or Nate Robinson. Robinson seems the most likely to move on. While he's a fan favorite and a burst of energy off the bench, he's an incredible defensive liability on a team that isn't all that good defensively to begin with. Another team might be able to do a better job of hiding him.

They'll also need to figure out what to do with Antonio Davis, who comes off his suspension on Tuesday night against the Lakers. He seems like a good guy to have in the locker room (provided his wife's not around), but he also wants to play. And it seems silly to take away minutes from Frye and Lee (and Taylor, as well). Besides, by the time this team's ready to win anything, Antonio will be old and gray. Um, older and grayer.

****

On another note, Chris Andersen kicked out of the League (for a minimum of two years) for failing a drug test? And, from what it sounds, it must have been one of the worst drugs—cocaine, meth, or heroin. The stories published on it made it clear that he HADN'T ever tested positive for steroids, and you only get booted for a third (or is it fourth?) positive test.

The funny part is that I just saw Andersen when the Hornets came to town last weekend. I was working on a piece about where players go out in their home city, and he seemed really eager to discuss it, though not in the locker room. He gave me his cell number and Tmobile address, and told me to call him on Tuesday. I asked whether they had found spots in Oklahoma City, and he just looked at me with a big smile.

I caught up with him Tuesday afternoon, but he was busy, and wanted me to call him back. And by the time I did get back to him, it was 11:45 p.m. Eastern, and he was already in bed. I tried him the rest of the week to no avail, and found out about his dismissal from the L on Friday night.

I just hope that when his two years are up, the Birdman comes back better than ever.

Friday, January 27, 2006

Trades

So yeah, Ron Artest is finally an ex-Pacer. The Maloof brothers, owners of the Sacramento Kings and several Las Vegas establishments, rolled the dice and swapped disgruntled (and soon-to-be free agent) sharpshooter Peja Stojakovic to the Pacers for the All-Star forward who hasn't played since December. It's been a rough month for the Pacers thus far—to add injury to insult, Jermaine O'Neal suffered a groin injury that will have him out for a minimum of eight weeks. This does not bode well for a Pacer championship.

As for the Kings, they needed to do something as well. Their defense was weak, their record atrocious, and ever since the trade of Chris Webber and the departure of Vlade Divac, things just haven't been the same. If Artest manages to stay sane, he should provide an element of toughness that hasn't been seen since the days of, God, Brian Grant? He'll be their best defender since Doug Christie, and probably their number-one option on offense (although Mike Bibby has been on fire lately). You would think if things don't turn around—or if Artest and Bonzi Wells immediately embark on a tri-state killing spree—Rick Adelman won't last too much longer. I suppose it's for the best the Kings have Brad Miller, who played with Artest in both Chicago and Indiana. Hopefully they got along.

The Pacers just needed Artest to be gone so they could get on with their lives. It would have been nice to get more than Stojakovic, who's pretty far off form this year, but teamed with a healthy O'Neal, he could obviously be a lethal perimeter threat. The only question, of course, is whether they'll be able to retain his services past this season. With O'Neal out until late March at best, they won't have much time to see how well he fits before deciding whether to offer him a lucrative extension. If they do, you would have to assume Austin Croshere's days in Indy would finally be numbered (they always have been, but apparently the number was triple digits).

***

Then there was today's huge swap, which sent (among others) Ricky Davis and Mark Blount to the Timberwolves, and Wally Szczerbiak and Michael Olowokandi to the Celtics. As Charles Barkley observed tonight on TNT, he doesn't see how this trade makes either team better. Taking that a step further, I can totally see this making both teams worse. Maybe KG will get along better with Ricky Davis than he did with Szczerbiak, but Blount has been every bit the underachiever that Olowokandi was this year. And Paul Pierce will absolutely hate Olowokandi, who is borderline useless. And will Szczerbiak be as good a second scorer as Davis?

It's a strange trade, because best I can tell both teams should be looking for the same thing: reliable veterans to surround their respective superstars (Pierce and Garnett) with so they can contend for a title—or, in Boston's case, at least a playoff spot. Exchanging your problems for another team's rarely works out. And I don't see this one working, either.

Monday, January 23, 2006

81

Seriously now, that didn't happen. They were Canadian points, so it was only like 65, right? Kobe Bryant torched the Toronto Raptors for 81 points on only (only, ha) 46 shots. Absurd. He bettered Michael Jordan's all-time scoring mark by an even dozen and didn't even need overtime (or, for that matter, all of regulation) to do it.

The worst part is that I didn't even watch it. Nope. Halfway through the Seahawks/Panthers I went to my girlfriend's in Brooklyn, and she doesn't have LeaguePass. Found out about it on the Channel 11 news this morning, then came home and actually endured SportsCenter long enough to see the highlights. Amazing.

It's only January, and Kobe has already done two things this season that Jordan never did—breaking 70 (and 80) and scoring 45-plus in four straight games. His 81 was only 19 shy of Wilt Chamberlain's record 100, and Kobe took 17 fewer shots and 12 fewer free throws. Not sure if Phil Jackson would say they all came within the flow of the offense (unless the offense simply flows through Kobe at all times), but the Lakers did get the W. He had 55 points in the second half. 55! How many players in the League have even scored that many in a game? (Let's see—Iverson, Shaq, T-Mac, LeBron...who else?)

The scariest thing, to me, is that it didn't seem all that difficult for him. Why shouldn't he get 90 later? Or a 50-15-15 triple-double? Regardless, he's making one hell of a case of who the best player in the League is. And he ain't in Miami.

Thursday, January 19, 2006

Stands

First off, I'd like to apologize for my absence of late. No good reason that I can come up with either, other than the fact that I can tend to be somewhat irresponsible. My bad. Gonna try to get into a groove of posting SOMETHING everyday, even if it's just a sentence. (I may have said that before, but hopefully I really mean it this time.)

Seeing that it's already 12:45 a.m. Eastern, I want to keep it short tonight, but I couldn't wait any longer to talk a little about what happened in Chicago tonight. For those of you who weren't watching Knicks/Bulls, it was actually an exciting game, with a Ben Gordon walk-off jumper ending things in OT. There was a brief scuffle between Chris Duhon and Maurice Taylor which ended with them both getting double-tech ejected. And Antonio Davis casually hopped over the scorer's table and went up into the stands.

Yep, Antonio Davis, the one-time Pacer, coached by Larry Brown, who was on the other side of things at the Malice In The Palace. Antonio Davis, who is 37 years old and the recipient of community service awards and countless accolades from his peers. Antonio Davis, who has been an All-Star and a mentor to many young players. Antonio Davis, who is the president of the Player's Association.

Now, this wasn't anything close to the Artest debacle. Apparently something happened involving Davis's wife, and he went up there to see what was going on. A natural reaction, to be sure. There were no punches thrown, and Davis was escorted back to the court (then back to the locker room) by arena security. Nothing happened. But didn't David Stern make it ABUNDANTLY clear after the Artest incident that players were absolutely forbidden from going into the stands for any reason?

Here's what he said following Artest's season-ending suspension last year: "We have to make the point that there are boundaries in our games. One of our boundaries, that have always been immutable, is the boundary that separate the fans from the court. Players cannot lose control and move into the stands."

Of course Davis's natural reaction is to protect his wife and chidren from harm. But this is an NBA arena in 2006. Has there EVER been a case in recent history of a player's family being harmed physically during a game? If there has been, I don't know about it. Sure, security didn't appear to be there when Davis arrived, but it was certainly on the way. There was no reason for him to go into the stands—in the opponent's building, no less—to do someone else's job.

If Stern was sincere in his words—and one has no reason to doubt he wasn't—Davis has to be suspended for his actions, however noble he felt they were. It certainly won't be for the rest of the season, but 10 games wouldn't surprise me. Whatever the case, someone definitely needs to get a quote from Artest.

Monday, January 09, 2006

Shooting Starbury

Hola.

So since the New Year the Knicks are 3-0, and Stephon Marbury has been brilliant. Recent stories in the NYC tabloids put much of the credit for Steph's recent success at the feet of Larry Brown—for criticizing him after a few poor games. Even Starbury himself has admitted that Brown's words motivated him.

But let's not have the Pope fasttrack LB for sainthood quite yet. After all, despite the current winning streak, the Knicks are still an abysmal 10-21. And Marbury's stellar play of late isn't exactly unprecedented. After all, he's in his 10th year in the League, with averages of 20.5 points and 8.2 assists per to show for it. This isn't exactly making a silk purse out of a sow's ear (to use an old expression I still don't quite understand). In fact, Steph's overall numbers this year are well below his career averages—18.3 and 6.6—and anyone who thinks all is rosy from here on out might want to take off the tinted glasses.

Things may be good now, but the Knicks are still a disasterpiece. Give Brown credit for moving David Lee into the starting lineup at small forward, by all means, but at the same time, please question why Lee was on the inactive list for seven games at the start of the season. Why was Trevor Ariza so upset at finding himself out of the rotation? Why was Jerome James suspended for "conduct detrimental"? (OK, we know that one, but still, shouldn't Brown have been able to to make him play/practice "the right way"?) Why did it take until January to find a starting lineup that made sense?

Meanwhile, Brown's old team, the Detroit Pistons, are on pace to win 70 games, and are the class of the Eastern Conference. Another team Brown used to coach, the San Antonio Spurs, are the class of the West. I'm just sayin'.

Sunday, January 01, 2006

Happy New Year!

Some people awoke today sad to see 2005 gone. None of them are employed by the New York Knicks. Only a Friday night Nets victory over the Atlanta Hawks kept the Knicks from having the worst record in the NBA when the calendars changed. Of course, their record is still putrid enough to require a heck of a lot of deodorant. 7-21. Not exactly what everyone expected when Larry Brown came to town.

In fact, the only person who's thriving on the Knicks appears to be the Post's Peter Vescey, who appears more than happy to fiddle while Rome burns. While his latest column focuses on the recent (on-court) misdeeds of Kobe Bryant, he still finds time and space to belittle the Knicks brand of "casketball," a rather apt description.

And there really isn't any reason to think it'll get better in '06. Stephon Marbury and Brown allegedly hate each other (a feud which the local media is more than happy to fan the flames of), their certain lottery pick belongs to the Chicago Bulls, and two months into the season Brown STILL hasn't settled on a starting lineup. If it wasn't for his flashy resume (and his $10 million per deal) he would have been fired already. The Knicks aren't just losing, they're losing badly, with late collapses (didn't Don Chaney's teams do this too?) and hanging heads. Confidence is essentially nonexistent, and the playoffs are almost certainly out of reach.

It's Isiah Thomas who assembled this capped-out mess, of course, and even the timely retirement of Allan Houston didn't provide much relief to the bloated payroll or the crowded backcourt. It did mark the official end of the Layden era, as every player currently on the roster was acquired by Thomas. Their record is his legacy thus far.

What we have is failure. Two overweight and undertough centers, a few talented rookies who don't know from one day to the next if they're starting or being put on the inactive list, three point-guard sized shooting guards, a shooting-guard size small forward (and no real small forward), and all of one player with a sense of pride—37-year-old Antonio Davis, who didn't even want to play for the Knicks in the first place. The Knicks' player with the most passion, Kurt Thomas, was traded for a player without a position, Quentin Richardson.

The Knicks may have a slightly better record than the Hawks, but at least the Hawks have a future. They're laden with young talent—Josh Smith, Josh Childress, Al Harrington, Zaza Pachulia, Marvin Williams—that can either be allowed to develop, or be traded for other pieces. They're also well below the salary cap. The Knicks, on the other hand, have overpaid cast-offs whose former teams improved upon their leaving. Ask the Suns and the Nets about Marbury, or the Bulls about Jamal Crawford.

There's a reason Brown has used 19 different starting lineups, and it's not just because he's lost his mind. He's trying to assemble a puzzle with pieces from different boxes, with some duplicated and others missing altogether. The lineup that would seem to make the most sense—Marbury, Crawford, Richardson, Channing Frye and Eddy Curry—is short on leadership, rebounding and playmaking, not necessarily in that order. It also makes for a lame second unit, with only sparkplugs Nate Robinson and Trevor Ariza bringing any bounce. AD has fire, but at 37 he can only burn so brightly for so long. At least he doesn't give up the lane.

Some of these mismatched parts would be tradeable if they weren't being overpaid. Surely a team could use Jamal Crawford, but not at $55 million. Or Jerome James, but not at $30 mill. Penny Hardaway's expiring contract may be attractive to someone, but they'd have to take another poison contract in return. They could simply let it expire themselves, but given the mega-dollar presence of Marbury, Curry, James and Crawford (and Richardson), they'd still be above the cap. It's unlikely Antonio Davis will return for another season, and if he doesn't, who'll pick up the leadership slack?

It doesn't look like it'll be Marbury. His game is still fluid and dynamic—he can score with the best of them when he gets on a roll—but his personality is still caustic and damaging. He wears his heart on his sleeve, and too often it's broken. Rather than try to pick his teammates up when things get bad, he leads the sulking, which is every bit as contagious as enthusiasm, and far more harmful. Despite his considerable talents, it's hard to believe the Knicks will ever win anything with Marbury at the helm. And with $80-something million remaining on his contract, it's equally hard to believe that the Knicks will be able to trade him until his final year.

This, of course, is Isiah's problem. Acquiring Marbury was his boldest move, taking on tons of salary and a player with well-documented teammate troubles. It got him (and the Knicks) positive headlines almost immediately, as the first step towards building a contender. Every step since then, though, has seemingly been a backwards one. There seemed to be no rhyme or reason to the way Isiah built a team around Marbury—players were acquired simply because they could be, with little or no regard as to how they would fit into a system, or with the point guard. Instead of building a team AROUND Marbury, and trying to avoid the missteps that had led to his departures from New Jersey and Phoenix, Thomas basically set Stephon up to fail. Vilified in the past for his score-first mentality, Steph found himself again the best scoring option on a losing team. And there's not much that can be done. In purging the roster of all remnants of things Layden, Isiah built a roster with little—if any—flexibility.

Maybe things will get better in, say, 2008.

Wednesday, December 28, 2005

Monday Night Farewell

I know, it's already Wednesday. And if you really want to get technical about it, I didn't see a single minute of the final ABC Monday Night Football game between the Jets and the Patriots. No big deal—football isn't my first love, and I had no desire to watch the limping Jets get pounded again (although, to their credit, they did wind up making it a game. Sort of). But I still wanted to weigh in a little as MNF moves to cable.

In short, I think it sucks. What's next, Saturday Night Live switching to HBO? (Although that would probably be a decided improvement.) 60 Minutes to CNN? Howard Stern to satellite radio (oh wait).

On one level, it doesn't affect me at all. I've got my 500 channels, and can find ESPN as easily as I can ABC. And NBC is getting the Sunday night games, so ESPN isn't getting any MORE games. But there are still a few things that bother me:

1) Despite what you may have heard, not EVERYONE has cable. And some companies don't include ESPN in their basic package (which is ridiculous). So you get the Sunday night game. That's great, but after watching the two afternoon games, how many people settle in for the third? I know I don't. But Monday night, that's traditionally the marquee matchup, the one everybody watches. Not anymore.

2) MNF on ABC is a tradition. A staple. And it gets switched—to the cable partner of the network, no less—over money? As a follower of pro sports for damn near three decades, I KNOW it's all just business, but you can only have your nose rubbed in it so many times.

3) ESPN is taking over the world. They've hired every columnist and commentator, gotten the NBA, now added MNF. They want you to think they invented sports, despite the fact that they're not much older than the Orlando Magic and they got their start showing log rolling and lawn darts. Admittedly, SportsCenter WAS the center of the sports universe for a time, but it's pretty much been all style over substance for the past half-decade or so. No one I know in the industry watches SportsCenter anymore—ESPN News is much better. ESPN doesn't want to report the story, they want to BE the story, and it's painful to watch. Chris Berman hasn't been funny since 1990, and Stuart Scott hasn't been funny since ever. And now this is who I have to turn to for Monday Night Football? No thanks.

Tuesday, December 27, 2005

Totally Week

Well, it was the holidays, right? Spent some time on Long Island with the folks, and a lot of time (what else?) shopping. Ended up missing Kobe's 62-in-three-quarters versus Dallas, as well as the Knicks latest home stretch (where they lost to everyone but the Jazz). Ron Artest hasn't been traded yet, and once again Kobe outscored Shaq on Christmas and his team still lost. The funny thing is that—while heralded as more of a one-on-one matchup—the Lakers/Heat wound up to be a much more intriguing game than Pistons/Spurs, which was pretty much decided after the Spurs' anemic 8-point first quarter. Obviously Ginobili's absence hurts the Spurs, but the Pistons are looking pretty unbeatable anyway.

Which brings us to Larry Brown, who, at this rate, should be considering retirement by—well, last week. He's tried countless starting lineups, which have only served to confuse and piss off everyone on the team at various points. Stephon Marbury is getting booed, Eddy Curry is woefully out of shape (and every loss ups his price—as this year's first-round pickm which now belongs to the Bulls, looks more and more like a high one). Finally the New York media seem to be taking some well-deserved shots at Isiah Thomas and Brown—seeing that one assembled the roster and the other coaches it, one of them has to take much of the blame. Payroll is still astronomical, and Isiah's main talent seems to be in the draft—and he dealt their next two No. 1s.

Which means it's up to Brown to turn this mess around, because there's no magic deal that's going to bring them under the cap or add young talent or first-round picks. This is not particularly encouraging, as Brown has looked decidedly overmatched so far. It's hard to look at this team and see promise, and impossible to see results. James Dolan is paying $10 million a year for this?

Monday, December 19, 2005

Portrait Of The Artest

It just gets crazier, doesn't it?

First Ron Artest goes to the media to demand a trade, now he goes back to the media to say "Wait, I didn't mean it!" Oh well. Too late now. Jermaine O'Neal has already stated that his business relationship with Artest is over, and unless the Pacers want to trade their All-Star center/forward (who, I may add, piles up community accolades as well as triple-doubles) instead, their path is chosen. Artest made his bed—now all he has to do is lie down.

If this was simply a matter of talent, it would be a more difficult decision. Jermaine's a great guy, but Artest is probably the better player. He can score from inside and out, and can lock down everyone from point guards to power forwards. It's the fact that he's insane—and I'm starting to believe that more as an actual diagnosis rather than just a throwaway descriptive—that will make him an ex-Pacer as soon as Donnie Walsh gets an offer he can live with.

Magid Johnson said on TNT that Artest needs to be careful, that this will be his last chance if he doesn't watch himself. I don't buy that. Artest is too young and too talented to go the route of guys like J.R. Rider and Glenn Robinson. But I do think he'll be out of the League by 30 if he doesn't get help for his readily apparent problems. Maybe there's concern that what makes him so bad off the court is what makes him so good on it—that if he seeks help, he might lose the ferocity and focus that makes him the best defender in the NBA. Maybe that's even what people are telling him. You know what? At this point, it doesn't matter. The bad is already outweighing the good.

I guess the worst part of all of this is that his 70-plus game suspension last year didn't change anything. Even after that, he has managed to exhibit the worst kind of judgement, and he may have again torpedoed a promising Pacers season before the New Year. Wherever Ron winds up, let's hope he learns something this time.